For Safer & LessRiskier Marriage one need Right “ChA.chAs Checks of Prospective & Expective Spouse” = Check_Appearances & Check_Antecedents.

My Behaviour = Psychology (My Brain) + Physiology (My Body) +Technology (My Bot) +Ecology (My Base) + Sociology (My Buddy) + Philology (My Brotherhood) + Maritology (My Bride/Groom) + Finology (My Bank) + Futurology (Brood).

There are 2 forms of Admin Actions.. at Right end of spectrum is Basised_Admin Actions with More Basis and less bias and prejudice, These actions empower group members and purpose. driven by Scarcity-Closet Mindsets. Me, Mine and My Interests only.

and at the Left end is Biased-Admin Action with More bias and prejudice these admin actions lead to disempowerment of group members & purpose.

here are few examples that happened in my experience of group adminship across the spectrum from good use of admin-power to misuse and abuse of power.

[16/12/2023, 21:37] Manjunath PP&TP: Hi man
[16/12/2023, 21:37] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): Hey man-ju..

What’s up?
[16/12/2023, 21:37] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): 😃
[16/12/2023, 21:38] Manjunath PP&TP: Msgs in the community are good/useful/informative now a days 🙂
[16/12/2023, 21:41] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): Ok.. 👍🏼..

Idea of group is that Hitam, Priyam, Satyam & Mitam
[16/12/2023, 21:42] Manjunath PP&TP: I have criticized you in the past but when the msgs are useful, it is my job to let you know too 🙂
[16/12/2023, 21:44] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): Hehehe.. thanks bro.. that’s kind of u..

To keep it mitam or brief only I send links.

Else the explanation will take long msgs..

That’s why I give links so that the whole idea is conveyed and is based and not partial
[16/12/2023, 21:50] Manjunath PP&TP: 🙂 it takes a gut to take criticism in constructive way. Not everyone has it now a days
[16/12/2023, 21:50] Manjunath PP&TP: Anyway, have a nice weekend
[16/12/2023, 21:51] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): Thanks bro.. btw what have u been doing nowadays
[16/12/2023, 21:52] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): It also takes guts to speak up against the admins and authority. Which u do..

I wish we all could do that with IISc administration too..
[16/12/2023, 21:52] Manjunath PP&TP: PhD 5 th year, data collection stage..
[11/02, 21:45] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): bro stop violating the rules
[11/02, 21:45] Manjunath PP&TP: Rules written by you??
[11/02, 21:46] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): https://bit.ly/3zMlXJh
[11/02, 21:46] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): so what.. the group also is started by me..
[11/02, 21:47] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): what are the rules matter more than who wrote it.
[11/02, 21:49] Manjunath PP&TP: The mention this in group info : My group my rules 😀
[11/02, 21:49] Manjunath PP&TP: *then
[11/02, 21:50] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): plz note that Content of rules is important.. link is secondary
[11/02, 21:50] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): no its accepted by all..

it’s our group our rules
[11/02, 21:50] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): u can change the rules too.if u read and find anything problem plz suggest
[11/02, 22:02] Manjunath PP&TP: Yes..add peer reviewed info
[11/02, 22:03] Manjunath PP&TP: If you can’t take criticism it’s alright..atleast be honest with that..
[12/02, 22:01] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): Recommending a gud group without any rules. can be an admin here and msg as one wishes..👍🏼

For all Indian Institutes Students Alumni, FANs & Collaboraters of Indian Institutes of Eminences for Collective Excellences.
https://chat.whatsapp.com/Ej1oS8jlTH8757eGKFR74W
[12/02, 22:01] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): can criticize the policy.

in above group can do as members please.. free no group policy

As Rationalists, we are Starting An Important Critical Inquiry into familial Institution for better marital-systems..

This article is a Co-created Post created by process of group-inquiry with Indian Empathic-Spectical Peers.(ESP-Group).

Please do share facts with sources perspectives:

we shall do a Case study of Indian Celebrity marriages also of 3 generations of Ambanis (Mr.Dhirubhai, Mr.Mukesh, Mr.Anil & 3rd Generation Anant Ambani(a global marriage).

[07/03, 11:35] +91 ###7 ###: I am interested in reading this but I am not able to access it. Could you send it in a document form?

[07/03, 12:34] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): its a community collaborative Writing.. an experiment.

one can share what can be useful in it.? so we can do the needful.

like below.

I want to scientifically study this phenomenon of marriage. what are the Costs, benefits and risks and how can it be made safer to reduce global abuse, divorce, rape, suicide and familial homicide rates. Current Marital systems are less-rational and cause lot of socio-marital-pains & familial-crimes so the family courts are clothes and marital-justice takes years and some marital-cases never resolved or closed(in case of Spousal-deaths(by homicide, Suicide or Systemicide).

the root of a society is family. and roots of family is in marriage.
[07/03, 12:35] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): irrational persons marrying in irrational marriages translate to more Irrational-societies.

[07/03, 11:35] +91 95457 64568: I am interested in reading this but I am not able to access it. Could you send it in a document form?
[07/03, 12:34] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): its a community collaborative Writing.. an experiment.

one can share what can be useful in it.?

like.

I want to scientifically study this phenomenon of marriage. what are the Costs, benefits and risks and how can it be made safer to reduce global abuse, divorce, rape, suicide and familial homicide rates.


the root of a society is family. and roots of family is in marriage.

[07/03, 12:35] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): irrational persons marrying in irrational marriages translate to more Irrational-societies.

[07/03, 12:36] +91 95457 64568: According to me the institute of marriage is against equality and does not make sense to be promoted in today’s world where we value equality
[07/03, 12:42] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): this is one of the effect/attribute of the system..

the question is what is the system, that causes these effects or defects.?
[07/03, 12:44] +91 95457 64568: That is something a sociology expert can comment on
[07/03, 12:48] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): experiencers also can comment..

like eg.

my experience of my parents or grandparents marriage lets me see that

their marriage was a social agreement and contract they made and kept between them as per hindu traditions initiated, facilitated & supported by their communities and Indian-legal System.

while now Marriage2024 is controlled by govt through marital laws.
[07/03, 12:49] +91 ########: I don’t understand why it has to be legally registered..it’s just two people who want to be together
[07/03, 12:51] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): this is a myth. its only a social relationship between two people. its not only illegal affairs or romantic affairs are between 2 people.

marital relationship is a tripartite contract with religion or nation.
[07/03, 12:52] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): there is a difference between being legally-together and illegally-together.
[07/03, 12:53] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): a model for Rational Secular-marriages are missing in this world..
[07/03, 12:56] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): a religious marriage is facilitated by priest/religious leaders.(Religion)

a political-marriage officiated by the marriage-registrar.(Nation)

a Rational Scientific-marriage initiated, facilitated and modeled by rationalists and marital-scientists. (Civic society).

[07/03, 12:57] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): #Lets Rationalify_Marriages

[07/03, 13:08] Purushotham Prof: Living together means we are social animals..

Legal means some convenience

Illegal means some other convenience..

Indifferent means philosophers..

For all others.. it is time to reflect upon..

While writing a chapter on 21st century adult education..
I took notes from recent supreme court judgements.. the hardwork and intellectual views of CJI.. and took note of other judges concerns..

Metaphysical..
When we say marriages are made in heaven, I am reminded of the vibrations, reverberations, resonance that both undergo.. take note of Gayatri mantra..and my interpretation that our own body subatomic particles are still burning and shining as ever as sun as cold plasma..

Philosophically I would say God Would have his last laugh when two people marry..

See my short story on Honeymoon preparations at Sun core.. a quasi science fiction..in Tamil.. where if one or two people say happy they will give birth.. instantaneously..
[07/03, 13:18] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): marriage are made in Heaven maybe a myth perpetuated by religious leaders who believe in heaven.

marriages are made in.. 3 ways only..

1. in innocence or 2. in informed consent or 3. in illusion by fraud.
   [07/03, 13:20] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): for a Rationalist marriages are to be made in awareness of all neccessary facts, calculations and training.
   [07/03, 13:23] Purushotham Prof: May be the problem comes how we understand the word marriage itself…

Our Sangam days.. we have one version.. annalum nokinaan, avalum nokkinaal..

Kandathum kathal..

Both saw eye to eye..then felt love for each other.. this might be different from sex ..

[07/03, 13:23] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers): Depending of the color of Marriage it can lead the marriers to Red/Black hell or Violet-Blue heaven on earth in their marital-life.

#Seven Colors of Marital-Life: Better Halves to Bitter Halves in Marriage-Spectrum.

[07/03, 13:25] G.R.P = G.R.PrasadH (Grit, Reason & Peers) responding to Prof msg: kadhal is love its not marriage. its a feeling no legal rights, responsibilities or duties..

marriage is Kalyanam.. its legally binding.

What is Religious-Marriage? What’s a Rational-Marriage?

Want to make a collective Inquiry into “What’s a Marriage and What it is Not”.. All are welcome to Rationalifying Space.

*Resource_Grp:* Free & OpenPlace 4 SciTech_Rationalism, Scientific-Temper, Atheism& Secularism and sharing Concepts of open, deep-tech(A.I, ML..etc) & Free_Sciencers. #Sundays4Science. #Sci-cling4Science.

ESPians Motto: *Love For Science, Live By Science, Lead With Science.*

*SciTech_Mitras_Grp:*
Citizens-Mission 4 More Scientific & Rationally_Stable_India🇮🇳 /2030:
https://chat.whatsapp.com/DCQ5If3f8FuDy3JVJaBq8L

https://grpvcare2dare.design.blog/2024/03/07/s416-whats-marriage-whats-not-marriage-a-rationalists-perspective/

reference:

S224: VVIP Marriages &  LIE-marriages; the differences. /GRP
https://grpvcare2dare.design.blog/2022/11/20/s224-how-to-have-a-vvip-marriage-grp/

Parivartan ke Theen Diya..

“3Ds of Development”  from Ones-Heart in body compassionately to Our-Heaven embodied collectively.

Taking Care of Dil Heart/Compassion, Dimag Head-Construction & Desh Haven-Country.

Any Solution can be better if it involves Dil, Dimag & Desh that is EQ, IQ & SQ.

it needs the right Sound, bright Source and the light Soul.

A relation/marriage is of 2 types.. one is a Family_Community arranged marriage (Sharing of responsibility for Tasks, Costs, Benefits, Risks & Collaborative Hears & Considers Voices & Choices from Wisdom of the Wisened. marital results and outcomes integrated for communities)

or a Self_arranged Marriage (Non-Sharing & more holding of Tasks, Costs, Benefits or Risks & Controlling marital-results between few, two or maybe even 1 (Hears more Voices of few More Power, control, domination & resources accumulated to 1 or 2 people or troupes)).

But the Outcomes are dependent less on the type of marriage and more on the *Degree of Collective Authenticity & Clarity* that is involved in the relationships of the 3 circles of Self+Family+Identity_Communities.

Below is a Citizens Practical Manual for caring for Dil (Heart), Dimag (Head), Daghar (Path), and Desh (Nation), focusing on Personal Health, Professional Growth, and Constitutional Duty. This manual provides actionable, integrative guidelines that balance emotional intelligence (EQ), intellectual clarity (IQ), purposeful direction, and spiritual/collective responsibility (SQ). Each section offers practical steps for individuals to nurture these dimensions while contributing to personal and societal well-being. The approach is fresh, concise, and rooted in universal principles, tailored for a citizen’s daily life.

Citizens Practical Manual for Caring for Dil, Dimag, Daghar, and Desh

This manual outlines practical steps to nurture Dil (Heart) for emotional health, Dimag (Head) for intellectual growth, Daghar (Path) for purposeful direction, and Desh (Nation) for collective responsibility. It integrates Personal Health, Professional Growth, and Constitutional Duty to empower citizens to thrive individually and contribute to society.

1. Dil (Heart) – Cultivating Emotional Health

Core Principle: Foster compassion, resilience, and emotional balance to strengthen personal well-being and relationships.

Personal Health

• Daily Practice: Spend 5 minutes each morning practicing gratitude—write or reflect on 3 things you’re thankful for to nurture positivity.
• Emotional Resilience: When stressed, use deep breathing (4-7-8 technique: inhale 4 seconds, hold 7, exhale 8) to calm emotions.
• Connection: Call or message a loved one daily to share feelings, building trust and support.

Professional Growth

• Empathy at Work: Listen actively to a colleague’s perspective during meetings, summarizing their point to ensure understanding.
• Conflict Resolution: If tensions arise, address calmly with “I feel” statements (e.g., “I feel unheard when interrupted”) to maintain harmony.
• Self-Care: Take a 5-minute break during work to stretch or meditate, preventing emotional burnout.

Constitutional Duty

• Community Support: Volunteer monthly at a local charity (e.g., food drives) to extend compassion to others, fulfilling duties of fraternity.
• Inclusivity: Challenge stereotypes in conversations (e.g., “Let’s avoid assumptions about their background”) to promote equality.
• Civic Empathy: Attend community meetings to understand neighbors’ concerns, fostering unity.

Exception Handling: If emotional overload occurs (e.g., grief), seek a counselor or journal privately instead of social engagement. For those with limited time, replace volunteering with small acts (e.g., helping a neighbor).

2. Dimag (Head) – Sharpening Intellectual Clarity

Core Principle: Enhance mental agility through learning, critical thinking, and collaboration for personal and professional excellence.

Personal Health

• Daily Learning: Read or watch a 10-minute educational piece (e.g., article, TED Talk) to stimulate the mind.
• Mental Rest: Practice a 10-minute mindfulness session (e.g., focus on breath) to clear mental clutter.
• Cognitive Fitness: Solve a puzzle (e.g., crossword, Sudoku) weekly to maintain sharpness.

Professional Growth

• Skill Development: Dedicate 1ლ, spend 1 hour weekly on an online course (e.g., Coursera, Khan Academy) to upskill.
• Collaboration: Share a work idea with a teammate weekly, inviting feedback to refine it.
• Problem-Solving: Break complex tasks into 3 small steps, tackling one daily to build confidence.

Constitutional Duty

• Informed Citizenship: Read a credible news source weekly (e.g., BBC, The Hindu) to understand national issues.
• Civic Engagement: Write to a local representative yearly about a community issue (e.g., road repairs), exercising democratic rights.
• Transparency: Support ethical practices by reporting workplace corruption (e.g., via anonymous channels), upholding integrity.

Exception Handling: If learning feels overwhelming, opt for audio content (e.g., podcasts) instead of reading. For those with limited internet, discuss ideas with peers to grow knowledge.

3. Daghar (Path) – Forging a Purposeful Direction

Core Principle: Align actions with personal values and societal good to create a meaningful life trajectory.

Personal Health

• Value Reflection: Write 3 core values (e.g., honesty, kindness) monthly and assess if daily actions align.
• Goal Setting: Set one small weekly goal (e.g., walk 10 minutes daily) to build discipline.
• Balance: Schedule 30 minutes weekly for a hobby (e.g., gardening, music) to recharge.

Professional Growth

• Career Vision: Define a 1-year professional goal (e.g., learn a new tool) and list 3 steps to achieve it.
• Mentorship: Seek advice from a senior colleague monthly to guide career decisions.
• Adaptability: Review a recent work challenge weekly, noting one lesson to apply forward.

Constitutional Duty

• Community Goals: Join a local initiative (e.g., cleanliness drive) yearly to align with national welfare.
• Justice Advocacy: Support fair practices (e.g., report discrimination) to uphold constitutional values.
• Sustainability: Adopt one eco-friendly habit (e.g., reduce plastic use) to contribute to a greener nation.

Exception Handling: If goal-setting feels daunting, start with daily micro-goals (e.g., drink water). For those with mobility issues, contribute to community goals via online advocacy (e.g., sharing awareness posts).

4. Desh (Nation) – Serving Collective Well-Being

Core Principle: Contribute to national progress through active participation, inclusivity, and civic responsibility.

Personal Health

• Cultural Pride: Learn one fact about national heritage (e.g., history, festivals) monthly to stay connected.
• Social Bonds: Attend a community event (e.g., festival) quarterly to strengthen ties.
• Health Advocacy: Share one public health tip (e.g., handwashing) weekly with others.

Professional Growth

• Ethical Work: Follow workplace laws (e.g., labor regulations) to support fair systems.
• Community Impact: Offer pro bono skills (e.g., teaching, designing) monthly to local groups.
• Innovation: Propose one idea yearly to improve workplace or community efficiency.

Constitutional Duty

• Voting: Register and vote in every election to exercise democratic rights.
• Law Abidance: Follow local laws (e.g., traffic rules) daily to maintain order.
• Unity: Promote harmony by respecting diverse faiths and cultures in daily interactions.

Exception Handling: If mobility limits event attendance, engage via virtual community groups. For those with limited resources, contribute to Desh through small acts (e.g., conserving water).

Implementation Tips

• Track Progress: Use a weekly checklist to monitor actions across Dil, Dimag, Daghar, and Desh.
• Seek Feedback: Ask family or colleagues monthly if your efforts align with compassion, clarity, purpose, and service.
• Iterate: Adjust practices based on outcomes (e.g., if volunteering feels draining, try a different activity).
• Stay Balanced: Allocate equal time to all four dimensions to avoid burnout or neglect.

Why This Manual Works

This manual integrates EQ (Dil: compassion), IQ (Dimag: clarity), purpose (Daghar: direction), and SQ (Desh: collective spirit) to create a holistic approach. It’s practical, flexible (with exceptions), and aligns personal growth with constitutional duties, empowering citizens to thrive and serve.

The Tricolor Special Museli Bhel includes all the 3 Colored PhytoNutrients from Veggies & Fruits.