S49: My friend Simon & Our 30 Years of Friendship.

Friends & Family are real co-passengers in the train on journey of life. Today is Simon my childhood best Friend’s Birthday and I felt like writing this Post for Him, my friends & our friendships.

Sharing here snapshots from this journey of friendship with a dear friend Simon. We are childhood friends since 1991 its 30yrs this year 2021. When I joined Lowry Memorial(SDA) an ICSE school in 4th Standard little did I know the “memorial’ in its name meant so many ‘memories’ for us. Its a good school next to the Iconic K.R Puram Bridge in Bengaluru and we as kids from school knew how small the old bridge was, We as teens saw the construction of the bridge from the bus stop.

I was a thin kid, Simon was my polar opposite a chubby kid. It was like friendship of Laurel and Hardy. And in life too we both got our own shares of laurels and hard times. some relationships are special time tested they shine like diamonds after being under pressure.

Being a new student in class I at start made few friends like Somu and Kulothungan.. as we sat nearby at desk. Simon I dont remember where he used to sit. I remember the 4th std was a moment of coping with new school as there were bullies and strict teachers to be scared about too.

The School was a big campus with lot of trees, gardens, Open grounds, Diary Bakery and agricultural lands too. It was one of a kind school in the area well respected for its education and facilities its school with Saturday Sabbath Holidays too. We had something called recess time, a Bio break, funny to imagine as the bell rang.. all guys rushed out to the outdoor toilet and since it was full and not maintained well guys used to piss in the fields too, and have competitions on who can piss the furthest or highest(Hahaha Boys will be boys) Our champ was D.S. (Talk about Fertilizing Urea to fields with Urine),(Only gross thing in post dont be scared to read on:)).

As I started to get accompanied with the routes to school via main road a high way, I dont remember how exactly it came that I got acquainted with Simon as one of the sub group of friends. Coincidentally his home too was on the way back to my home via the “bande‘” a huge quarry hole it had become a big pond, a risky road. My dad used to drop me to school and So we started to walk back home together. I used to accompany him to his home and then walk towsrds my home through narrow lanes of Andhra Colony of Tin Factory area.

I remember in middle school we started to have lunch together Simon, me and other friends(Mohmmed Miraj, Sunil & Sanjay Mishra) we used to have a designated place near the bell tree next to the mulberry plants and High school complex. Later we shifted to near the Chapel Corner outside Simon’s friends house. We had excellent Computer lab and science lab facilities. Also PU, TCH and Hostels with NE children from Meghalaya, Mizoram etc. It was really a multi-regional school.

I got introduced to his wonderful grandma we called her Ammachi(90+ yrs God bless her- she’s a retired Teacher from TN) and his parents and sister. They all are really good friendly people. I am grateful to the love and wonderful moments shared at their home & Movies(King Kong & Anniyan @ Pushpanjali). The times sitting on Mats on the warm roof together on their terrace looking at the moon & stars. Was a feeling of belonging and friendship I cherish, also the intricate glass items at his place. His grandma used to teach us like in a tuition(my first Tuition Teacher) where Simon and me used to do our homework together. While she used to listen to a Tamil Radio on a silvery Radio, they used to have a money plant at the window-door too..

We used to play together also watch TV & movies together too (Bro I Got to return you CDs that I Borrowed 10 yrs back), he used to come home too to play games and spend time together as friends, as our house was lonely with no neighbhours on either side and 2 instance of burglary in it so we had a dog, an untrained mongrel usually we used to tie it on the stairs. It used to be acquainted with our regular house guests but when its mood is bad, it used to get aggresive suddenly even with me(got bitten twice) and my dad. We had a difficult time to control it(I wish some Dog whisperer was there for us) it used to climb on people friendly and scare them. Once when Simon came home, I Instead of taking the dog away by mistake told Simon to come thinking its acquainted with him, he also trusted and walked near door, it jumped on him I remember him getting scared and he walked away. I think it was a hurtful thing for our friendship. Once Simon also was bullied by a Senior in school for having stood up and complained about a cheater(Copying chits) in exam, a friends elder brother was threatening him. I was a mock spectator of this threatening I dint know what to do as a friend. I wish I had known about the bystander intervention and supported my friend. I too was punched in my eye, previously held up by the scrotum by bullies in my school so was scared myself and wasn’t aware. (BAD EFFECTS OF watching WWF on TV replication). At that One time I regret I could have been a better and stronger friend and stood up for him against the bullying.

In school together we had seen through A friend loosing his dad at an young age, another losing his young brother to kidnap & killing found on KR puram lake, love struck friends, accidental death by swing, kid drowning in bucket, 2 friends loosing their sibling to suicide, Nalle Ba urban legend, Cycling and playing cricket at ITI, Final 10th exams at Mahadevapura Govt school, etc we had done many crazy & unique things as kids.

May be it triggered another fight, I dont remember how it started during the lunch time, my version is my lunch box got accidentally dropped some carelessness and I was blaming him for it was so petty thing I could have let it go, but we were angry at eachother. And we broke our friendship for over a year when we dint talk with each other.

The peacemaker for us was ammachi(his grandma), may be when I was in 7th or 8th. She told me to let go and be friends again. I said ok but I dint know how to rebuild the friendship. We were in 2 different sections of class now in high school 8-9th . I cudnt meet him in school and I dint go to his home too.. And then it happened a magical moment as I was walking back home I remember near New Light hotel at corner of K.R Station Simon was walking ahead and I approached him from the right put my left arm on his shoulder and said “Hi Simon“. He turned and just smiled and we chatted & walked back together and rebuilt our broken friendship, one step at a time home wards.

We have been keeping track of each others journeys and also may have played some part in it too, though I studied in a different school SDA in Tenth I was one of top 5 in class @ Spencer rd branch, We were lucky enough to study in the same Pre-university college CATS though he & HRehman were from a different class(PCMB) I made many friends thanks to J & R (Shanawaz, Diwakar etc) and me in PCMC (Sam, Vinodh, Sandeep, Prasad, Ashwin etc)

We travelled in Bus together boarding at Railway Station getting down at B Station and boarding at MayoHall.

And friends used to come home as it was on the way, they were prompt on time.. as I developed some kind of IBS at those stressful teenage years, I used to get delayed in the mornings and my friends used to wait for me, it was awkward (Sorry brothers if I made u wait it’s due to irregular nature’s call, Now I think I would have advised my younger self to eat earlier and wake up early to be on time). I got bullied in college for topping good Marks in GAT(Galaxy Aptitude Test)(forced to go sit in back bench by a nexus of dominant group of boys) & English test by some Competitive nerds (Peer Jealousy) too..and once crossing the road from school I told Simon i dont want to top in class and this was my self fulfilling prophecy my motivation to excel had dropped and I struggled in my final exams. (Tip to friends: dont talk critical matters on road, it’s a deep discussion talk in private where we get good acoustics and comfortable environment, There is less scope for misunderstandings and more chances of right resolution)

I had visited most of Simon’s Education(Mission college & GCC) & workplaces like ITC-infotech(later in time)(BBM) where he worked hard to fund for his MBA, Aditya Birla(Near Spencer rd Internship), Bhoruka Gas(Mahadevapura), MaFoi(Anjaneya Complex), Wipro(Ecity)(Coincidentally we arranged for a lunch meetup(2011) together near his office we ordered food and I received a shocking call that shattered me, he was there at such crucial moments beside me by Gods grace) and recent company I met him by luck on the road near his office on Ring road(Serendipity).

I used to remember his landline phone number, I have heard his gym and back slip story it pained me too scary, I remember it when I go to gym lucky he cured it naturally just like his eyesight(He was nicknamed Dumma(Fatty), Dadiya and Soda butti(Wearing Thick Glass) I disliked why people called him so (Luckily by his will power and long walks he maintained his slimness later). His liking for Indian Trains( The Push & Pull train we used to watch from School also was visible then was ITPL which was called Singapore Complex, coincidentally our school was near rail coach factory & a Rail Station.

We(Rehman & me) used to go on long walks initiated by him to Nekkundi lake, Byappanahalli & ITI colony on weekends, it was really fun thing to do. Theres so many memories associated at SDA school If I share it may take 100 pages, I shall focus here for Simon’s Stories.

Simon is a special friend, a best friend who has stood by me in times of victory & loss..Life has been a roller coaster ride, and it’s really a reassuring to have people who understand us and care about us and sometimes much more than one does about themselves. This I learnt later in school when I read the play The Merchant of Venice by Shakespeare about loyal Friendship of Antonio & Bassanio (it increased my trust in friendships), while my brother & his friends in ICSE(2002) learnt about Julius Ceasar about betrayal (think negative topics should be avoided in impressionable minds without filters).

Friend in need is a Friend indeed,

I would like to acknowledge all my dear friends who like Simon have shared special friendships with list is big and in it especially Chronologically (Arun/Arvind-GuruMoorthy, Sandeep (Vasanthnagar), Kishan-Manjesh(Bsvngr), Sunil, Rehman, Joson , Sudesh & the Udaynagar Friends, Prafulla-Manju, Sam-Vinodh, Srikanth-Yohan, Venky-Lakshmi & archi gang, Santhosh, Gagan, Suraj & M.Des gang, Abhishek & IIScians, Ramachandra, Mathan, RR, MD, TK, P.I.. there are many more who I’m really grateful for their kindness and warmth during our shared time in journeys.. though many may not be in correspondence as much as before still the bonding and feeling remains as shared earlier.

Dear Simon,

Thank You for being such a good friend.. Happy Birthday Brother..

And I am lucky to have you as a dear caring friend. I am really grateful and thankful to you and your friendship bro, your family and our common friends too.. Thank you,

Yours from a loooong time.. and more longer future as friends.

Your Dear Friend,

Guru Prasad G.R.

Poem on Friendship.

We board a train thinking about the destination,

Similarly in life we hop into an instituition,

We may find others too in the compartment,

Diverse group of people strangers in this predicament,

Among them we may find neutrals, bullies, allies and mentors,

The more good allies we find the happier is the journey,

These friends have our life’s treasure chest’s golden key.

A friend In need is a friend indeed,

A friend who reads you right is also a friend we all need.

People are special who with their unconditional care give us hope,

Come what may on this journey they are ones who give us power to cope.

We can learn a lot from our fellows, search not far you will find some near,

If you are not finding some in your life, you can be the one for others dear.

-GRP

People may become acquaintances by chance, people who stay with the journey by choice are the friends.